Ser Cleve the Thief

There is no Honour among Thieves.

Ser Cleve
Friend of Swans.
Disco Inferno.
Who fled before the Wild Hunt in the form of a dove.
Who sailed to Hel and Walked out.
Who also sailed to Hell and walked out.
Who poked Harald the Weakling in the eye.
Do not trust his maps!
status: living
class: thief level: 9

Cleve is known for wrestling the Cat of Storvadhis and poking Harald the Weakling in the eye. He wears many guises. He never makes a promise he may not be able to keep and as has led many brave men and women to their deaths he makes no guarantee of the safety of any who travel with him. On no occasion trust his maps for they are made of meaninglessness.

Rival Wizards slain: 3
Basilisks slain: 6
Times turned to stone: 1

Cleve is 40 years old.



  • Old Johansen, cleric, of Manorladder
  • Miklos the sailmaker, of Welsey's Port
  • Kedhabjorn, the sailor, of Fiangle's Landing

Research Assistants

  • Speedy the girl
  • Hedda the toad
  • Geoffrey Diamonds the Rot Demon

Test Subjects

  • Mopar the demon donkey

Forms taken


After Braynoch's Cliff: End of an Era Cleve lost his mutant powers.

Disco Inferno

Ser Cleve sailed into hel with Morden Mordeth, Mumblefluff, Killgore II, Blint The Arbiter and Sheba. He paid a visit to Blint's Ultra Lounge, the best bar in Hel. Nobody knows for sure what happened but the next morning the place was a smoking ruin and Cleve had fire in his veins.

Wrestled the Cat of Storvadhis

In the Quest for the Miscalot, the party sought out the lair of the Cat of Storvadhis, terror of the Stonelands. After many adventures involving stealthy scout parties, bad air and the loss of many good friends Ser Cleve came face to face with the beast, and with a secret wrestling move was able to subdue it for long enough for the rest of the party to arrive and slay it.


In Into the Woods 1 Cleve snuck in to the basement of a dread chaos temple. This caused him to go insane. He knows a secret truth known only to those who do not know because it can not be known or unknown. Every day he fills books and scrolls of truth and every night he destroys them lest his knowledge contaminate the world. Under the care of Dr. Baelfjord he began his recovery in Braynoch's Cliff: Would you like to Cleve?

Poked Harald the weakling in the eye

In To Steal a Feather most of the party fell under the charm of the Siren Countess. Cleve was able to escape, regroup with the few other survivors, and launch a rescue attempt. This time things went better - he poked Harald the Weakling in the eye, freed the party, and fought the Siren Countess spell for spell.


Cleve fell under the influence of the Rakshasa of Wikrobe Tower. For a year he sought the lair of the Demon Queen of Lonhall that he might break what binds her and bring her fully through to this world. In Braynoch's Cliff: Would you like to Cleve? his curse was broken and he was returned to the party.

Braynoch's Cliff

In Braynoch's Cliff XXV: Herpetology Cleve was detected approximately 50 feet south, 120 feet west, and 100 feet down from the base of the Grand Staircase in Coolsville. Or at least his hat was.

Games with Giants

In Braynoch's Cliff XXVIII: A Giant Interlude we saw Cleve's Ring of the Badger on the hand of a giant. So perhaps Cleve has been getting around without us.

rating: +1+x
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